Kylie Jegou
Kylie Jegou
Who is Kylie Jegou?
Let me briefly introduce myself. My name is Kylie and, like Brad Scott, I have many years of experience investigating the paranormal. While Brad and the members of NZ Paranormal use scientific means in their quest to determine if a place is haunted or not, I’m afraid I’m a bit more…old fashioned, to be frank - I see dead people. There, I’ve said it, now get over it. I am not actually a physical part of the NZ Paranormal Team, (so rest assured, I’m not going to be jumping out of their Paranormal Van armed with rosary-beads anytime soon), but Brad has seen my work and likes to keep me around simply to pick my brains once in a while as my knowledge on the subject is second to none. I am just another voice here to give a second opinion.
There is a big gaping void between Science and Religion, and that is where I come in.
While it is quite an unlikely association, in some ways you can call us “The Sceptic and the Psychic”, (Brad does actually believe in the existence of ghosts, he’s just harder to convince). Although Brad does not always share my views, I think it also gives the website a more rounded edge, because lets fact it there are many people out there that have had actual experiences and want to share them with someone who most definitely knows you are not crazy.
Not to mention - there are three advantages to knowing someone like me:
1. My years of research stemming from trying to understand my dilemma;
2. My knowledge of what to do when actually coming across paranormal activity; and
3. For those particularly sticky situations that may require someone like me who has researched demonology and the occult.
From my experience I would have to agree with Brad that a good portion of hauntings are simply an extension of someone’s overactive imagination, and like Brad, I have never done this for money. In fact my client’s don’t pay very well at all, as I am more interested in representing those who have passed on than those with actual bank accounts. Unfortunately, as I have the ability to see them I usually become more frequently haunted than any old house.
I admit I have seen some things that are most unpleasant. Frankly, its dirty work, but despite people with dubious talents such as these often being deemed a little flakey, I have managed to take more of an even view of life after death and have been able to sift through a lot of the bullshit. (You must excuse my language at times, after all I am Australian).
Foreword
Aside from my articles regarding my field work, I will also be posting a series of Excerpts from various papers I have researched and compiled in the last 18 years. Hopefully these will address some of the more frequently asked questions in relation to this industry. If you have any direct questions regarding ghosts, please email us so we can have the chance to either post your questions or answer you directly.
While I will usually refer to scholarly, religious or scientific theories, I would like to make a special note that while I may not go into detail regarding theories of astral planes and ethereal bodies, I would still like to thank all the mystics and psychics I have met over the years as they have been an integral part of my research.
What keeps you up at night?
As long as history has been written, there have been countless theories arising from the subject of the “paranormal”. It is a subject that has crossed continents and has never been restricted a particular culture or religious belief system. The argument of the existence of spirits by scholars, mystics and everyday people has never waned over the centuries. Even today, not even science has fully explained that which cannot be understood. As with all things beyond normal human comprehension it is often met with scepticism, resistance and flights of fancy. You would think well into the new millennium, this subject would have either been proven or debunked by now. In this day and age where the body is no longer mysterious, almost every inch of the earth has been discovered and in the century where space will inevitably become our new frontier, why have we no more answers then we did in the sixteenth century?
So the question still remains as it always has…do ghosts exist? Is there a life beyond our physical realm? If so, who are they? And if not, why do strange things happen? On a small scale it can be described as: the chills up your spine; a feeling of someone else in an empty room; hearing or seeing things you cannot explain; a sudden drop in temperature and so forth.
Hardly conclusive stuff, I know. However, many of you who have experienced something swear by it. Those who haven’t do not even want to entertain the possibility.
If you asked me directly, do ghosts exist? And it’s because of my rather unfortunate insight, I can say with the utmost conviction that they most certainly do.
Explanations of the extraordinary
Article One – The Theories and Scientific Studies behind the Soul
There are numerous theories and scientific conjecture about the Soul, however, I have written about a couple of the more commonly accepted versions.
The Theory of the Soul
Almost everyone in the human race is acutely aware of something inside of them which cannot be described as the mind or the body. I of course am referring to the Soul or as today more commonly referred to as our “Being”. If I were to put it eloquently, I would have to quote Eckhart Tolle “Being is the eternal, ever-present One Life beyond the myriad forms of life that are subject to birth and death. However Being is not only beyond but also deep within every form as its innermost invisible and indestructible essence.” THE POWER OF NOW, 2004, Cht 1, Pg 13. Let’s face it; I’m not so eloquent, so I’ll just describe it as “something you know is there”. (So, I’ll never have the threat of someone quoting my literary works).
The real you, the essence, the life force, the only part of you that has any permanence. It is not just something you feel inside you; you can sense it in that moment of connection with another, when you allow the clutter of your mind stop for that brief moment. It can be when you hug your child, when you lock eyes with an untameable creature, during the stillness of meditation, sitting on the balcony with a cup of tea and your dog, or when your breath is being taken away from exhilaration. That is the real you.
It is stillness; it fills you like an overflowing cup, and somehow in that moment you know you are connected to something greater. That is your Soul.
The Science of the Soul
In an attempt to explain the unexplainable, persons of a scientific persuasion have theorised that the soul ip so facto as a series of chemical reactions. While a Psychologist may tout that the Soul is nothing more than an extension of the Freudian “Ego”. Well, if the Soul is to be reduced to theories of science, then let’s use a scientific fact to bring dimension to this ongoing debate. While speculation of chemical and mental projections are yet to be proven, the scientific community (unless they are of the “Mad” variety) agree that almost everything, whether it be animal, plant or mineral has a certain level of electronic vibrational frequency that can, in a majority of cases be measured.
So how do we emit this vibrational frequency?
One very tangible explanation is that when we are alive, our bodies continually work like a small factory, new cells being created, digestion of food, brain activity and movement all generate heat creating an electro-static field which radiates beyond our physical selves. With this point, I would have to concur; after all it makes sense. But, what really intrigues me, Electro-Static Metres (and other instruments that go “ping”) aside, is how the average person is more than equip to sense vibrational frequencies than they realise. Even in this socially disjointed age, we are still incredibly sensitive to other peoples’ surrounding energy.In its purest form, this sensitivity helps us pick up peoples’ current emotional state, true intentions, and gauge a situation. Even though we heavily rely on our ability to create intelligent thought during the judgement process, we often find that our feelings brought on by these vibrational frequencies (i.e. our “gut feelings”) are usually correct.
Back to the Soul…curiously enough, a person’s individual frequency is always different to another’s and we have the amazing capacity to tune in. How often have you been at work and a colleague standing behind you; at that moment, you will know who it is without turning around. It is because they emit a particular vibrational frequency that is familiar and recognisable to you. So we come back to that question… when someone has a physical death, why is it that their frequency, even years after they have passed, can still be picked up; both by instruments that read these frequencies and by those who are slightly more sensitive to these than others?
That also explains why when someone you were relatively close to comes to visit you after they have died, you can not only sense someone else there, but can usually also tell the difference whether the spirit is that of a person, whether they are male or female, and even have a very strong sense of who that person actually is. The same experience for household pets that have passed away has been described in the same way.
Article Two – Death and other Mysteries
Well, there is nothing mysterious about Death itself. Whether sudden and unexpected or the just the expiry of one’s life, in the end we all die; that much is without argument. So what happens when the fat lady belts out her final Aria?
The main questions asked are:
Is there a place (as the religious doctrines would call it) like heaven?
- Do we simply wander around the earth in a state of purgatory or some type of fourth dimension?
- What’s the difference between a ghost and a poltergeist?
- Do we re-incarnate? and
- Is there just a black nothing after we draw our final breath?
Here are some explanations going on my studies into the afterlife:
Heaven/Joining the Collective Consciousness
Well not all souls wander aimlessly on earth, so we have to assume they eventually go somewhere, and sometimes even years after they have parted they will come and visit people they are close to down here on earth, so we can safely say that they don’t just vanish into thin air. These are usually the Souls who are simply ready to pass on.
What happens if I don’t believe in the existence of Heaven?
If you don’t believe in the existence of God, a Collective Being or Heaven, or anything particularly wonderful after death there is a good chance you will wander around for a while before you say to yourself, “well this is boring”, and perhaps then you may open yourself up to passing on. My best friend was still an atheist after death, but I haven’t seen her in years, so fingers crossed.
What happens if you are not ready?
If you have unfinished business (and I’m not talking about laundry here), if you are still too attached to your physical body or physical life, or if the death has been sudden, traumatic and unexpected, you can be either left trying to contact people, correct a situation you feel responsible for or not accept the fact that you have passed; so there is even more of a chance you will wander around even replaying a moment in time and usually require some help to pass on.
What if I do not want to pass on?
If you do not want to leave a house or a person, no amount of talking or holy water can make you go, if you do decide to stay you may need some help to learn to adjust to those now living in your space and vis versa.
What’s the difference between a Ghost and a Poltergeist?
While you will still be you after your death (fundamentally speaking), if you have been dead for some time (or just a bad person to begin with) and have not passed on, then you risk your Being becoming corrupted and distorted by the isolation. In your frustration you may become mischievous or even destructive. In this state, you will often draw others like you to your dwelling and we no longer describe you as a ghost (harmless) but a poltergeist or evil presence (actually can cause harm). This is the part where I would suggest the living consult a priest. I have found priests usually quite understanding and helpful with appropriate bible passages, etc but will not go into battle for you as they would have to get permission a lot higher up. I respect those who have no religious beliefs, however if you are faced with a situation like that you really can’t afford to be too pig-headed. I have once been in that situation when called out to a job, and I would have to say, not even I could help the occupants. In most cases, I would strongly suggest you actually vacate the building quicker than Elvis.
So if we are meant to Pass On, what’s all this talk about Reincarnation?
Sometimes when our purpose here on Earth is far more important than we can fathom, we will re-incarnate to carry on our task. That is why the Dali-Lama is a continual Spirit, and that I why my cat keeps coming back to me. (I know that sounds a little ridiculous, and go figure, my cat is more important then I will ever be). I also believe if you are desperate enough to want a second chance at life, you can find a way to come back in another form. In fact, I’ve been recently scoping the Internet for a more suitable host body (watch out Angelina Jolie!)
What if I believe there is nothing?
If you believe that there is nothing but a black hole of nothing, (I’m sorry, but this belief that there is nothing on the other side kinda pisses me off), with any luck that is what you will experience. That’s your choice and I hope it works for you. Good luck with that.
Article Three – Things that go Bump in the Night
When you were young, you may have experienced a sense of fear and were convinced that a “Bogeyman” lived either under your bed or in your closet. Your parents would tell you it was just your imagination, so what if we as adults experience that same fear? Is it just an extension of our childhood fears and an active imagination that never quite leaves us? I would love to tell you right now that this is the truth, and we can all go back to sleep at night.
So, here am I, yet another sleepless night, it’s currently…1.59am in the morning and I have a Bogeyman keeping me up. For me, this is no real surprise, after a number of years it becomes the equivalent to finding a huntsman spider on your bed, nothing that cup of tea and writing an Article while your nerves steel themselves can’t fix.
Although, it is a little nippy tonight, and me and my cat would much prefer to be under the doona then at the computer. What can I say, except for the dead are a noisy bunch, and sleeping with a pillow over my head only works some of the time. So like these supposed Bogeymen, why is it that you only see ghosts at night? Is it because our senses are heightened at night? Do we feel isolated and vulnerable when the sun goes down? Are these circumstances just adding to our collective fears and therefore our imagination?
Well, good news is, for the most part the answer is yes. So most of you can just go back to sleep.
But…
(You knew a ‘but’ was coming…) experiences of ghosts and things that go bump in the night are a reality for some of us. So, the question remains…why are most of our experiences usually at night? In all honesty, a ghost does not care what time the day is and they are just as active during the day, as they are at night. While, like you, I have seen a majority of my client’s “situations” when I have gone out on a job at night, but, having also seen the odd dead person or paranormal activity during the day I know that the am/pm thing really has no relevance to them.
So, are most cases involve activity seen at night, here are a few facts interwoven with theory:
1. When night time falls the air naturally becomes denser, and using the theory of souls having electro-magnetic frequency means that with thicker air particles “appearances” which are visible to the naked eye are easier to detect;
2. During the day due to too much normal activity going on around us, unless we are in a moment of isolation, we are unlikely to notice any paranormal activity (lets face it, as a society, with our fast food, big screen TVs and shopping malls, with all that going on we barely notice the other “living” around us, let alone the “dead”); and
3. When it becomes dark, due to primal instinct to protect ourselves and our home, we become more aware of our surroundings and therefore more sensitive to any unusual noises. Also, darkness and/or isolation can make us feel more vulnerable, (with the exception of when we are sleeping of course).
Article Four – Making Contact
I don’t know whether you will see this as good news, or bad news, but we are often frequented by loved ones checking up on us (nothing new here). In fact almost all of us have more than one “spirit” who watches over us. You may ask, “well what the difference between great old grand-pops popping in for a visit and a haunting?” Well for one, visitation is as natural and normal of a circumstance as seeing your Auntie Doloris. You may simply feel like seeing them because it’s been a while, or you may hear that they are sick or having a bad time, so you feel compelled to go and see them. When you pass on, it is still possible to do this, if anything, your access to the ones you love is greater.
So, what if its not great old grand-pops just to say hello, what if it’s a loved one with unfinished business, or some unknown entity…that is what is defined as a haunting.
I See You’ve Got Company – Part I
Paranormal activity usually arises from an entity doing the following:
a. Going about their business;
b. Trying to make some form of contact; or
c. Doing their hardest to be noticed.
Some are in your face, but most aren’t too attention seeking. I will tell you one thing, with the exception of Kurt (he came with the house, nice guy), once a spirit gets even the slightest suspicion that you can either see them, or are at least are aware of them, they will continue to attempt to get your attention. Why, lets face it unless your happy being here, you will do anything to elevate isolation and boredom. It is human nature, and why should it be any different when we are dead?
I See You’ve Got Company – Part II
Well it is now 3.07am in the morning, and my very patient cat wants to get back under the doona, so I’ll sign off for now. But the next posting will be in relation to what do you do if you suspect you or your house is haunted…until then my friends, sleep well (or at least better than I do). Boo for now.
Well it’s been two weeks since my last post (sorry I went on holidays), so the readers can now stop emailing Brad with enquiries to when my next post to Explanations of the Extraordinary was going to happen. I understand that some of you feel that this will be probably one of the more important articles in relation to ghosts, as this is where I can let you know what you should do if you suspect you or your house is haunted. This article is dedicated to those of you whom have written into us letting us know you are having problems.
When you believe you are experiencing a haunting; groups such as NZ Paranormal can prove to be particularly helpful especially when it’s your own peace of mind to consider. Brad and his team go into suspected haunted sites and by using their equipment can usually establish whether there is a likelihood of paranormal activity. This enables them to look for particular “cold spots” or where activity levels are high. This alone can often help those affected to ascertain if there is defined activity or if there are absolutely no indications of a haunting. The information is then given to the person(s) whom engaged NZ Paranormal’s services to do with as they wish. Surprisingly, in the instances where activity were confirmed, in most cases the occupants are usually just happy to know that they are not crazy and will often find it “cool” that they have a resident ghost.
So, what if you are indeed haunted, and you’re not happy with the situation, what do you do then? On those occasions where the client wants to know more about the individual who haunts them, or prefers to have the ghost move on this is where Brad may engage the services of someone such as myself as a consultant, whether via video link or for those big jobs I have been known to fly over to New Zealand to visit the client on site. Like Brad and his team, I do not charge for my services however, depending how urgently you want me over there I may cost you an airline ticket. Otherwise I am usually in New Zealand at least twice a year on business and will be happy (time constraints pending) to view your case then.
I must warn potential clients though, the reason why I don’t charge for my services is that I tend to work for the interests of those whom have passed and not the living occupants (hence it not being particularly profitable field of work). So, if the spirit does not wish to move (and I do not deem them to be a threat), I will not force them out and you will just have to learn to accept their presence. Trying to drive a spirit out can sometimes make the situation worse, so it is important that methods of exorcism be avoided unless totally necessary. Anyway, there are advantages to living in a haunted house, for example I quite like general uneasiness of my house after nightfall for the following reasons:
1. You never feel lonely;
2. We’ve never been burgled (we’ve got worse things than a Chihuahua here); and
3. Guests don’t like staying for too long.
But, say you’re not too keen on the non-living arrangements…before I even entertain the subject of exorcism, what can the average person do at home when faced with such a situation? The most effective methods are as follows:
1. The Cold Shoulder
In the first instance, I would suggest ignoring the entity. The reason why this is number one in my book is simply because once a ghost knows that you are aware of its presence, it can try even harder to get your attention and inevitably disturb your peace even more.
2. Bargaining and Bartering
If ignoring the ghost makes no difference try talking to it. Keep chatter to a minimum and request specific things from it. If it makes a racket walking up and down the stairs every night, go out where the activity is occurring say “Excuse me, I don’t mind you being here, but I’m trying to sleep. Can you keep the noise down please?”
3. Rack-off Hairy Legs
If the ghost gives off a feeling that makes you feel a little icky (and I’m not talking about you just being a little scared of it) and you want it to go away, shout at it. Yes, that’s right, get a little crabby and tell it straight “I don’t want you here! I demand that you go-away now!” This can make them angry, but that’s only in 5% of the cases, 65% of the time the spirit will leave, and the remaining percent simply (like a cat) will ignore you and carry on as normal.
4. Walk into the Light
If you get it into your head that you wish to do the old “Jennifer Love-Hewitt” thing and you wish to assist them to move on, in the first instance – you WILL need to open yourself up enough so you can enable yourself to feel them. Once you are aware that they are there with you fill yourself with a sensation of great love and compassion; once you feel you are overflowing with peace, firstly tell them softly that they have died (sometimes they are not actually aware of this), let them know it is time for them to move on, and ask them to look for and move towards “the light”. However, if you the type whom has difficulty producing emotions (as described above) it may be more effective to open up can of beer, sit on the couch and watch the footy. A word of warning with helping a soul cross over, word spreads quickly and once you’ve successfully completed one task you may find yourself in my situation where the house is no longer haunted, but you are.
5. Using Props
Smudge sticks, incense, candles, chanting, rosary beads, holy water or prayer are more effective for non-human forms, bad spirits and ill intent directed to you by someone you’ve peed off. Props such as these aren’t particularly effective in getting your run of the mill garden variety ghost out, but rather the “intent” used behind it. If you feel props will protect you and help you in this situation of helping a spirit move on, then go your heartiest.
Article Five – The “E” word
For those few times where it has been necessary, the traditional Catholic form of fervent prayer using particular passages of the Bible, holy water and crucifixes are surprisingly effective (I’m not particularly religious, so that’s why I find it surprising). However, having had at least minimal tutoring by Father John Burns of the Star of the Sea Catholic Parish, I would recommend this be conducted by someone with some experience and you don’t attempt this yourself. (A priest will lead you in the write direction will not actually perform an this act themselves as they have to go very high up to get permission to do so).
Back in the early days, using the traditional method was standard practice for myself and my team. However, one job that we were called to, I would have to say we saw things we have never seen before. Whatever forms we were witnessing in that apartment were not human and were perpetuating actual harm to the occupants. It was only after we spectacularly failed in exorcising whatever it was out, it was then I came to the realization that when faced with something so evil that the bible or my standard paranormal research were not going to help me in these situations. As I said before, whatever was in this apartment was not human and in a quest to find out what it was that drove us all out, my research lead me to find my answers in books on the Occult.
“Study” being the operative word, not “Practice”. It was here in these texts I found actual descriptions of what I had seen in this apartment and along with something considerably older than Catholicism. The practice although minor in its elements similar to Wicca is still religion based and a language so ancient that although written has not been spoken for centuries. Hence, this is often called the “unspeakable method” and although truly a beautiful and awe-inspiring thing to watch it is not something I would talk about openly. The only reason for secrecy is that it is definitely not something I would wish to encourage someone use at home as it can put the person doing it in danger if not conducted properly. By attempting the unspeakable method, the practitioner can unintentionally draw the spirit into them or at least have one or more of these nasties follow them home. But when done properly with the correct equipment and incantations can definitely empty a room.
I must admit, the practice did have one definite draw-back for myself personally, my ability to see and speak to those whom crossed over became too strong, hence my retirement. But what I no longer willingly do in practice, I hopefully will make up for with imparting knowledge for the next generation that wishes to fight the good fight.
Article six – Dealing with the Death Card Part I – The End of the Bus line
While some may find comfort in believing that there is nothing but a black void after we pass, the bad news is that death of our physical body is not the final chapter. Having both seen and spoken to those whom have passed, as stated before; I can unequivocally confirm that the most important part of who we are forever lives on. Not just simply in the minds and hearts of those who we leave behind, but in the truest sense.
In some ways, the fact that our story does not end with our last breath can be a little overwhelming. Some may ask, if we are not living (in a physical form), then what is our purpose to carry on? There is truly a grand design to all this, and being just another mere mortal like you, I am not meant to have all the answers. The mystery of life and our evitable death is meant to remain as such, a mystery.
As humans it is in our nature to want to have all the answers. The reason for this is because we believe that knowledge will give us the power to control our own destiny. So you can see, in my line of work why I find this rather futile quest so damn funny. Even though we try so hard, (I’m just as bad as anyone else, I’m addicted towww.cainer.com – love your work JC and often indulge my friends in the odd tarot reading) at the end of the day when it comes to THAT moment, control is a luxury not at our disposal. Although life itself is full of irony, when facing our eternity, it is pure and simple “trust” and not knowledge or control that will lead us to safety.
Those who have experienced that moment and lived to tell the tale, often describe it as the following sequence. At the moment just before actual physical death you are in darkness and not fully aware. When you begin to leave your body it is described as if you are passing through a tunnel into a light. You feel compelled to travel towards the voices beckoning you on the other side. The light can be a little overwhelming as your eyes try to adjust to it. Some at this point have felt isolated, vulnerable, scared and then a sensation of feeling safely encased, warm and held tightly by someone you’ve never met before but you somehow know all so well. Does this scenario sound familiar?
I think the best analogy to describe the experience of death is very similar to that of birth. Death, like birth is part of the natural process and the cycle of life has come full circle.
As I mentioned above, I do not hold all the answers, but please carry these words with you at that moment, however death comes to you – Death of the physical form and the subsequent crossing over should be as involuntary as breathing in and breathing out. The trick is to relax and in the most literal sense let your self go. Unless you feel you absolutely must, do not try and fight it. You can try to re-enter the body, but in most cases you will be unsuccessful. That often explains why if death has been sudden or if a person has unfinished business, their attempt to stay in the realm of the living usually just ends up hindering the crossing over process. Hence creating what the industry calls a ghost. If you find yourself stuck on that plane between life and death, although this is not “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” (Douglas Adams1979) with “DON’T PANIC” written on the back, all is definitely not lost. Other windows of opportunity to cross over will come and just as natural as birth or death, that is when you feel ready. This means your state of limbo and how long it lasts (minutes, hours, days or years) is really up to you and your acceptance of the situation. For those few who will find crossing over difficult, someone like me will suddenly become your best friend.
Part II – Advice for those that are left behind
It’s true when they say is that the ones who suffer the most are those that are left behind.
In my next posting I will be discussing such topics as:
- Dealing with Grief
- Making Contact; and
- Moving On (Life is for the Living)
Sorry its been soooo long since I’ve written any articles (aside from little tid-bits for Brad), but with writing my third book and going to one too many functions the articles get a little way-laid. I spent a considerable amount of time of late attempting to write about grief and how to handle it, and I must be completely honest with you, even I have a hard time handling grief and I know for certain that there is life after death. In writing my chapter on grief for the book, I found myself with tears just simply rolling down my face as I had to relive all the feeling that losing someone has given me, even it has been 10 years or more after the fact.
At this point, you’re probably thinking, what good is it, if someone who can still grieve over the loss of loved ones when she has the ability to have insight to the other side…I mean, what hope is there for the rest of us? But you know what, it is okay to grieve, and it is definitely okay to cry. The loss of the physical portion of someone is a very real dilemma to deal with, even when you know that they are okay and in their own way.. “still here”. You may cry every day (and seemingly ever hour) for the first two weeks, then that becomes, once or twice a week, then you find yourself breaking down a couple of times a year and, ten or so years on you may still shed a tear. And as I said before…its okay to do so. But as you can see, although the loss is still real, (without trying to sound like a Hallmark card) it does get better.
Death of someone or something you love is never meant to be easy and grief is a very personal thing to each one of us. If it’s a spouse, it is not uncommon to be in a state of fairly constant mourning for one to two years. If it’s a child, even longer, and in some ways, like I said that sense of loss never really goes away. Allow yourself to feel that loss, but you must NOT allow that loss, that grief to be part of your identity. You are NOT just a widow/widower, you are not just a mother/father who lost their child, a person that lost a friend/lover or close family member. You are still you, with or without them in your life. Whether you like it or not even in death, the world still turns on its axle, the sun will come up everyday, your chores will still be waiting for you and life and its journey continues on…including new life, fresh special moments just waiting to happen to you.
When my best friend died a friend with whom I’d been estranged with simply turned up on my door the morning of the funeral with a note which read “When God closes a door, he opens a window…”
And you know what, whether you believe in a God or not, it is true on so many levels. Grieve, please do, its normal, its natural, but don’t forget to live. You don’t have to “get-over” the loss of someone, I don’t expect you to…but as soon as you can, you must…and I mean, MUST get over yourself. Remind yourself, they died, yes, but YOU DIDN’T.
I will post more on grief shortly, and things you (and those around you) can do to help in the transition.